Blissing and Reminiscing

Today I spent most of my morning in a blissfully, dazed state. My poor patients and coworkers. I bet they thought what the hell was wrong with me when I was unable to comprehend the most simple facts. I suppose I can thank my sweetie...she has that effect on me. Well her and many, many orgasms. All I can say is WOW! So why was I never told how fabulous sex gets the older I get? I've never been multi-orgasmic until just the last few years. One day I was suddenly multi-explosive. Now don't get me wrong...I'm not complaining but I can't help but wonder sometimes-what changed?

Some people have told me it's just my age. The old line about women reaching their sexual peak in their 30's. Others have said it's just part of maturity; feeling more comfortable and confident with my sexuality. Maybe those theories are partially accurate, but I can't ignore the incredible mental and emotional connection I now have with A. It can't be a coincidence that things changed around the same time A and I went through a major change in our relationship.

We had already been together for quite a few years and as so often happens, we were going in different directions and being consumed by other things. First I was finishing school and she was working like a fiend, then she went back to school to further her education and after graduation it just became work, work, and more work as we were getting into our careers. We had been reduced to roommates and there was a major lack of intimacy...and I'm just not talking about sex. There was little to no cuddling, hand-holding, kissing or intimate conversation. We still went and did things together but we were more like friends than much else. I'm thankful for that friendship though because we truly respect and enjoy each other's company and that was the tie that held us together through that time. Neither one considered leaving or looking elsewhere. We were just stuck in a relationship rut, so much so that we actually went on a fabulous beach vacation for a week and never had sex once! What a waste of hotel time!!

One evening we just looked at each other and I was suddenly so overcome with loneliness for her that I blurted out "I miss you". Isn't it funny how you can live in the same house and sleep in the same bed and still be lonely for each other. That's when the floodgates opened and we talked like we had not talked in years and promised each other that we would improve our situation.  Somehow just getting it all out on the table helped and we found our way back. We put each other and our relationship ahead of everything else. I've always loved A, that I have no doubt about, but the last several years it has grown into something stronger and deeper. It's a feeling that's hard to describe and maybe there are no words...maybe you just have to feel it yourself to truly understand. All I can think of is just the pure joy and satisfaction and all consuming love I feel with her.

So that's my sappy post this day and my little walk down memory lane. It's good to remember times like this though to keep it all in perspective. I don't want things to ever slip away again.

Now this Saturday we are off on our first RV adventure. Just a couple days and an overnight at a campground about 1.5 hours from our home. It will be our maiden voyage and we don't have much planned; just hanging by the fire, riding on the bike trail and getting the dogs accustomed to the whole ordeal. Saturday will be a bitter-sweet day when my little foster, Jazzy, goes to her new home. We will be driving through her new hometown and dropping her off before continuing on our little trek with only the 6 chins. She going to a fabulous home and I couldn't ask for a better situation for her. I know by letting her go I will be able to foster another but what my head says and my heart feels are two totally different things. All I can say is happy trails to us all!
 

A Comedy of Errors and I'm a Jackass!!

Today A and I decided to go shopping at Ikea. We've been talking since summer about purchasing some new furniture items for the living room. It's become a Christmas tradition that we both contribute to buy a larger item(s) for the house or plan a vacation then just buy each other a few smaller things to open on Christmas day.

We slept late and A made waffles for breakfast. Then she hurried me to get ready to go; mumbling about the weather and traffic and we had to get things done today. We hopped into the piece of shit truck, A turned the ignition and nothing but a click. The battery was dead. I said, "maybe we should wait and go another day". She insisted the truck did this a couple weeks ago and although the battery needs replaced, after she got it going last time it was fine the rest of the day. It's been sitting in the cold weather for over a week, blah, blah, blah. So I wait patiently while we jump the truck and finally get on the road. We have an uneventful drive and once parked at Ikea I suggest, "maybe we should just keep it running while we go inside". She reaches over and turns off the ignition saying it will be fine, just watch. She turns the key again to show me the piece of shit truck will start and it only clicks. Now I'm pissed! She insists we go get the items we came for and then we will deal with the truck.

We went into that packed store and I was furious! That means that I now have no patience for meandering idiots or unruly children or pain in the ass people in general. We load up two platform trucks with our purchases (with the help of the cutest little gay boys), check out and head to the loading zone. A swears she just knows the truck is going to start. Lucky for me it was a pleasant sunny day because I had to stand on that loading zone for a LONG time! I was right again and the truck would still not start. We had one lucky break when A was just ready to call for a tow truck a nice gentleman from Iowa stopped and offered to give us a jump start.

A pulls up to the loading zone and starts backing up. I'm trying to handle two heavy platform trucks that don't drive worth a damn and look up to see A backing over one of the loading zone signs. I let go of the cart I was driving and started yelling and waving at her to stop. I then directed her forward and to my relief those signs are spring loaded and the damn thing popped back up! I turn around to get my cart and the one I was pulling when A was running over the sign has run off the curb and tipped one of the boxes onto the parking lot. The corner of the box is ripped open and a piece of wood is broken/torn off the product inside. Holy shit!! What else can happen!!!!! A and I load the rest of the boxes and I head back into the store. I had to go wait in the return isle and a nice lady went and got a new box to replace the damaged one. We loaded up and headed home.

Now to share my jackass moment. A and I have been discussing being more open and affectionate in public. She is open to it even though she has said it will take some adjustment for her. We were walking through the store today and she reached over and took my hand. I was so furious at that moment that I pulled my hand away and told her, "I'm so angry at you right now, I don't want to hold your hand!" 10 minutes later I felt like total shit. She took the initiative, stepped out of her comfort zone and I was a complete and total jackass to her.

On the way home I apologized for my bad behavior and she admited she didn't give a shit about running over that sign because she was imagining it to be me. She apologized for not listening when I suggested we leave the truck running. Within a short time we were laughing about all the things that went wrong on our trip and she said the next time I insist we postpone something, she will listen. I can't help but still feel terrible for not holding her hand. So what should my punishment be?