Monday, December 7, 2009

I'm Going to Have to Change My Phone Number

I'll start from the beginning. Twelve years ago I dated this guy (Pete) for a short time. Actually, it was supposed to be convenient sex for me but whatever. Anyway, after a few weeks he tried to make it a "relationship" and started talking marriage and children. I was so outta there!! Honestly, I could not stand the idiot; we didn't have a single thing in common except great sexual chemistry. I tried to break it off and be civil-he didn't get it. I finally resorted to being rude and nasty-that just lead him to start stalking behavior. This continued on-and-off for years, even after I started dating A. It finally culminated with him drunk, cornering me in a parking lot and threatening me. He was trying to argue and wouldn't let me get in my car. I told him to call me when he was sober if he wanted to talk. He grabbed me and I punched him in the nose (see my dad's self-defense lessons paid off). He let go of me long enough I could get in my car. As I started it and tried to drive off, he jumped on the hood of my car. Honestly, I just floored it and I didn't care if I ran his stupid ass over! He rolled off the hood and fell in the parking lot; I just kept driving. After that he tried to call and apologize; I berated him and told him to fuck off and he finally backed off.

Fast forward to this summer. In July, my mom begged me and A to go to the county fair with her and my nephews. We ran into Pete there and he actually came over to talk to all of us. All I said to the man was hello; A and my mom did all the talking. Three weeks later, I pick up my phone and see I missed a call and have a new voicemail. I checked the number-it looked familiar but couldn't place it. I was just starting to check my voicemail and my phone rings again. I answer and it's Pete. Fuck me was all I could think. He was so drunk I could hardly understand a word he was saying. Basically what I could figure out was he had seen me at the fair and wanted to call and apologize. I told him it wasn't necessary but I appreciated it and then got off the phone as quickly as possible. The voicemail he had left was basically the same thing and I managed to record it off my phone onto my mp3 player. I may still upload it if possible. Boy, did A and I have a good laugh at that message!!

A week before Thanksgiving, I'm on my way home and my phone rings. I assumed it was A and answered. It was Pete again. This time he was sober and called to apologize again for his past behavior and for calling me when he was so drunk. He started talking about how he was trying to make changes in his life and really felt he needed to apologize. I accepted and told him I hope he can finally change himself and get some closure on the situation. We then had pleasant conversation, caught up on his/my family, what he's doing for work these days, etc. I wished him good luck and hung up.

This past Thursday my phone rings again and Pete is once again on the other end. This time he's been drinking and is talking like an idiot. He was talking about the past and I realized how much he had built up the relationship we had into some great love story. He then started making sexual comments and actually had the nerve to invite me to go on a weekend trip with him. I told him absolutely not and reminded him I was happily "married" to A. He then started commented on how he couldn't believe I was still with "that dyke" and mumbling some other things I'm probably glad I didn't understand. Now honestly, the vindictive bitch in me wanted to let him have it and insult a heterosexual man the one place it truly hurts-their manhood and sexual performance but the rational part of my brain won out this time. I thought if I start it he may start his stalking again so I just told him to never call me again and hung up on him. If he calls one more time, I'm changing my phone number. That really sucks too-I've had this number a long time.

One side note though. I received very little satisfaction from hanging up on him. I really miss the old days when you had the heavy phone receiver that you could slam down and the person on the other end got the loud clunk in the ear. Pushing the "end" button and the quick cut-off just doesn't do it for me.


aneke said...

Oh dear.

Not getting the message, is he?

I'd change my number. And ride OVER him the next time he jumps on your hood.

crystal said...

He sounds like a sad little man who feels emasculated by the fact that you wouldn't rather be with him than the person that you are in love with.....simply because she is a woman! I am not sure if this is right, but I will never understand this phenomenon; men who love the idea of lesbians, but feel "knocked down" by the actual reality of it.
Anyways, I am rambling. I would definitely change your phone number, this guy sounds like he could cause some problems when drunk! Be careful, ok?

crystal said...

Oh, and upload that message! :)

vixen kitten said...

Mmmm, I'm voting for uploading the message too!

I'm so sorry you are going through this. I had to change my number last year because of the very same thing.

*hugs* I know you can use a few extra right now. This shit sucks.


Jude said...

Hopefully he's gotten the message by now but I'm betting he's going to call again during his next drukin stupor.

Fuck with his brain, answer the phone in an accent and in broken english say "you lookin for Mel?, Mel who?, sorry wrong number".

And I've ummmm, slammed my cell phone down on the table first then pushed the button. Still not the same and I'm expecting the cell phone to shatter into pieces one of these days. ;)

Sarcastic Bastard said...

Poor you. You're nobody until you've got a stalker, I always say. Laugh.

Love, SB

CJ said...

Stalkers suck! And there is no way to actually GET RID OF someone like that....unfortunately!

Mel's Way or No Way said...

Thanks ladies. If he ever gets in front of my car again, I am likely to mow him down!!

Jude-good idea. I've been planning to upgrade my phone anyway.

SB-all I can hear in my head is Dean Martin singing "You're Nobody Til Somebody Loves You". Sad thing is there are some women out there who would find that behavior attractive.

tommy said...

what a wack job!!!

Organic Meatbag said...

Holy shit...that first drunken encounter sounds like something from the Terminator movies...hahaha